i think, i wrote non-sense things, sorry.

Did you experience that you have so many things in your mind, that you want to express, but when you try to express it thru writing or speech you get stunned or stuck, because you don't know what words you should use and how you going to deliver it? Uhhmmm, I tell I experience it a lot of time. On the way to work, then on the way back to home. Lot of things that I want to say, to the people I care. But I know , it will be no good to tell it or express this is because of some situation already change, and at the end of this... all the words I should say, and things I knew it will never help anymore to make difference, to help others.. It will better leave UNSAID. Too worst to knew, that we waste our time, and we knew there will be no good result. And it’s painful to realize that there are some people you care so much, is actually didn't care to you or they being fake for all this time. You become blinded because of the charm, beauty, fun, excitement- and distort your decision to choose between the good and the right, and to know the bad and wrong, to follow the laws and principles. These are the thing that goes around my head recently. But I finally realize that this are all the things that Satan use in weakened our spirituality. Things that we see good, we always thought that is right. But that’s not all this is not right. We knew the bad things, but do we consider white lie is wrong too? We follow the laws (bible ten commandments), but do we examine and train our heart to mold our conscience to follow the principles which will leads to follow the laws. The person faithful in what is least is faithful also in much, and the person unrighteous in what is least is unrighteous also in much- Luke 16:10.
This is the reason why, I don't want to express my feelings and thoughts. It’s better to be left UNSAID to avoid people around me to get hurt. This is the reason why, I don't want to see things or hear news that makes me stumble, because it will just weakened my spirituality. In contrast, on back of my mind I fall to a lot of questions and answer... why i have toungue to talk? Two hands to write or type? And eyes and ears to use to observe and hear the information? Questioning my own mind? This makes me more confuse. But getting the answer from bible and people who loves me and makes me strong in spiritual wipe out the confusion, and it paints the true happiness in my life. Thanks for my family, my Christians friends, you are always there. I guess... that’s all for tonight... I write these things, because I have fingers to type on the keyboards, a mind and heart that need to vent the thoughts and feeling once in a while. I want to DO the words "SORRY". But HOW? ... I don’t want to think anymore, coz it will be goes on and on......questions?? And answers!! Good night...